4. Lectures

For people who dislike doing the six lectures associated with a three day then the 17 lectures of the two week (let alone the 45 lectures of the six week) looks like a nightmare. However if you find Intensive lectures difficult you are unlikely to contemplate running a long Intensive. You have to actually enjoy the Master role and all that goes with it to be able to run long Intensives, and this includes the lectures themselves. Basically on a long Intensive you have the opportunity to teach what you know about personal growth and Truth in the lectures – and it is what the participants expect and need. They also need you to go on about the technique, both in general and in detail, each and every day. And you will also need to go on about the mind in one way or another. The reason for this is that actually that is what is going on – people are struggling to be free of their mind and the tool they are using is the technique. That’s the bottom line and you have to keep coming back to it every day.

You will develop your own lecture style and format to suit how you are on Intensives. I decided that I was being too serious. That is my nature, to be serious, analytical and forcing. So I deliberately introduced a lot of jokes and silly stories into my lectures and also deliberately talked a lot more about surrender – I left the persistence bit to come across from my nature. This style evolved into telling two silly stories at the start of each lecture – and it was useful in grabbing people’s attention, waking them up a bit and helping them to let go. A scattering of jokes and funny incidents throughout the rest of the lecture also kept people awake and listening. However if you know that your style is lighter, more naturally surrendered and easy going then you may need to deliberately include stories about persistence and overcoming heavy obstacles in your talks. The point is to try to get a good balance between will and surrender, between being light hearted and grounded, between interesting and inspiring stories and giving them the information that they need.

Over the years I have become better at surrendering the lecture content. Indeed on the six week I actually gave several lectures that I, the personality, thought were inappropriate, but they were just what the participants needed and were extremely successful. Here’s what I wrote to myself shortly after the six week;

“I had prepared the ground by reading lots of books and making a note of good stories I found. I had also made very short notes on some of the stories that had arisen in my own life that seemed to provide good material. During the morning period, especially before and after morning walk, I would just put my attention on the group and see what occurred to me. Sometimes it would come as a series of thoughts, sometimes as an issue that needed to be dealt with, sometimes I would catch things that people were saying that seemed relevant. Sometimes a topic would occur to me that I would dismiss, and then notice it kept coming back. Sometimes I would be busy thinking about something, such as guilt or forgiveness and try to put it aside to find out what lecture should be about – and then realised that I already had what it should be about.

Once I had the main topic or theme clear I would then do quite a lot of thinking about how to thread the ideas together, what stories to tell and anything that seemed particularly relevant to the group or any individuals in it. (Sometimes I would put an issue in a lecture to target just one participant.) Often I would get more ideas for stories to tell as I thumbed through books at lunch time. By the end of lunch my preparatory work was finished and I would take into the group room all the books I might need to read from. Then during the dyad before lecture I would again put my attention on the group and allow changes or refinements to occur to the overall structure of the lecture. I would also usually write out the first part in some detail so I could get started correctly.

Once I started delivering the lecture I would not normally look at my notes again. I would actually surrender again and things often occurred as I was talking. I would refer to the notes again right at the end to check I had not left out anything important before asking for questions. Sometimes I noticed that I had left out a chunk of material, and usually decided to just leave it alone – it had been dropped for some reason I knew nothing about. If it was a logistic issue then I would find a time to mention it. The net result of all this is that the lecture material was largely generated by surrender, then wilfully ordered and structured, then delivered in a surrendered state. It worked extremely well. Virtually everyone was inspired and bowled over by all the lectures.”

Another important aspect of the lecture period is to encourage participants to ask questions. Everyone benefits from a good question and answer session. It is very important that you do not end your lecture with a powerful story if you want to encourage questions. Powerful stories will affect people emotionally – and they will be still digesting that when you ask for questions. They will also be unwilling to raise a mundane issue of how to decide what came up as a result of contemplation after listening to an amazing story of courage in the face of death! So put your big stories well before the end. I would follow the big story with a discussion about how it relates to what’s going on in the here and now, and how it relates to the technique and then go on a bit about some aspect of the technique. Then ask for questions – and it would usually work well.

The other thing to emphasise is that people love hearing about you. They want to know how you are, both in your ordinary life and as the master. I would quite often describe what the intensive looked like from the Master’s chair and this seemed to work well. But what inspired them most was stories when I struggled with my own stuff, with my mind and had to face something unpleasant. You do not lose altitude by owning your shit – provided that the story does end OK. For example on the six week I was plagued by problems of leaking bathrooms, particularly leaking showers. It was persistent and distracting and also meant that some times the participants lost use of a bathroom. After pondering this – after one leak put water into the group room – I realised that there was an issue in it for me. I wanted the Intensive to be perfect. I had covered all the bases – but the leaks were a reminder that I was not really in control. So I told the group about my self inspection, my desire to be perfect – and being willing to let it go. Amazingly enough the leaks did actually get a lot better after that!

But by far the most important thing of all is for you to be present when giving the lecture. If you are there and in contact with the group then even the worst material will work OK. If you are not present then even the most stunning material will not work. It is you that they need – it is you that inspires them.

Finally you should know that you can strongly influence the group’s energy by the style, tone and content of your lectures. It took me a while to realise this. The energy on a my two weeks peaked around days 10-11-12. This leaves two, three or four days with not much to do and my lectures used to let the group fizzle out. In later years I deliberately wound the group up again on days 12,13 and 14 and managed to get another flurry of experiences on the last two days. I wound the group up by being genuinely enthusiastic, telling amazing stories of commitment and courage and reminding them over and over that experiences happen towards the end of the group. And it really worked. But you have to genuinely have your own energy under your control to be able to do this – you cannot fake it.

The following sections explain how I describe the technique and how I elaborate parts of it at various stages throughout the Intensive.

4.1 The Technique

I describe the technique in a great deal more detail on a long Intensive than on a 3-day. I also include it in every single lecture (except the closing talk). My purpose in running long Intensives is to facilitate deep experiences. These are different from those that typically occur on a 3-day. On a 3-day most experiences occur when the participant is not paying much attention; it is as if they have been tricked by lowering their guard momentarily. Deep experiences do not, in my experience, occur like this. Deep experiences occur when the person is contemplating their object steadily and deeply. Then the deep experience is entered into as part of that steady contemplation – and usually the person has the ability to re-access the experience for a while (see also section 5.3 for further detail on this). So I emphasise the importance of continuing to contemplate throughout the day, whilst eating, walking, working, sitting – and in five minute breaks and physical exercise periods.

An Aside on Satori events: I participated in a 7-day Satori event run by Osho sannyasins. It uses dyads and similar questions and rules to an enlightenment intensive. But it is actually using a different process to attain a direct experience – and it took me several days before I realised this. In the Satori event the aim is to have an experience by being completely present in the moment. To aid this they have three active meditations a day (like the dynamic meditation) each lasting an hour. They do not encourage contemplation at all – indeed some Satori leaders require people to retain eye contact at all times during the dyads. So if you have people come on your Intensive with a background in Satori events, you would be well advised to explain the difference to them – preferably ahead of the actual group.

One issue that can arise is with people who have another regular meditation practice. They may find it quite hard to avoid using it, especially in the sitting period and other periods outside the dyads. I stress that whilst other practices are really excellent, they do not mix with the EI process (I say it is like having two good recipes, one for a cake and one for gravy. Whilst both are good, mixing them produces a mess.) I will often work carefully with these people to help them avoid slipping into familiar states or using tricks of being quiet from their regular practice.

I encourage people to establish habits that work for them and enable them to contemplate steadily. Thus I encourage them to do the same job each day, to shower at the same time each day, to use the same walk and the same exercise routine. By doing the same each day they also remove the element of choice, which can be distracting. I emphasise the element of steadiness from day three onwards.

One of the other things that I state quite early on is that people should expect their subjective sense of doing the technique to change. By this I mean that their inner experience of intention and of openness is very likely to change.

4.2 Intention

On a three day Intensive people can confuse intention with wanting or desire, and it will not impede them. But on long Intensives this confusion can be a serious problem – because people think that once their feeling of desire for truth has gone then they are no longer intending. So I usually devote part of a lecture quite early on (often day 1), to explaining that intention is a choice, a decision – and that this is different from the feelings of desire or wanting. Feelings inevitably come and go, they certainly cannot be sustained for 14 days through a process where the individual experiences times of elation, depression, love, boredom, criticalness and so on. But a decision to go for the Truth no matter what can be carried through all those different states.

I think it helps to give people examples of other situations where one can have an intention without knowing in detail how it will turn out. The two examples that I use are

intending to resolve an argument. When I am stuck in an argument I can spot that my intention is to be right, to make the other person wrong. Whilst I have that intention the argument rages unresolved. If I can shift my intention to resolving the argument then something different happens. I will not be able to anticipate how the resolution will come about – nor who is right and wrong about the content – but the argument does get resolved.
intending to resolve an issue in a therapeutic context. I can go to a therapist with a clear idea of what is wrong and a clear decision that I want to work it out – but do not know how the issue will be resolved. It may require me to shift my perspective, or to see a connection to some childhood experience .. or any number of things. I do not know in advance what will be involved or what In have to face, but it is critical that my intention is to resolve it.

I advise people to consciously renew their intention. I suggest that they explicitly place their choice for the Truth above any choice to

have something interesting to say to their partner
look good
avoid something bad
stay in a nice state

I personally found it helpful to do this each time I was given the instruction. It ensured that my intention stayed aligned to having a direct experience. I think this served me well on all the Intensives on which I participated.

I emphasise this material about intention quite strongly at the beginning of the Intensive because it has been my experience that, in the end, people do get what they intend. I used to explain the “Creative Law” process (as explained in Geoff Love’s book “Quantum Gods”) at some point in the Intensive – largely because I saw it as an exercise in aligning one’s intention very precisely. But I found it distracted people too much and was not strictly part of the process. Nor did I find it increased the number of experiences.

Sometimes people get hung up on the word intention. It has some other meaning or connotation for them that is an obstacle. If this arises I explore alternatives such as choosing, deciding and setting out. One of these usually works well.

4.3 Object

It is my view that on a three day Intensive it is best to never mention the object of enlightenment. It is a detail too far for that process. But on a long Intensive it becomes enough of an issue to require some explanation and attention. Basically the object of enlightenment (hereafter referred to as the object) is simply the self, life or another – depending on which question the participant is working on. There are three common errors associated with this part of the technique. The first is to not put their attention on the object at all – to just ask themselves the question. The second is to hang onto a particular object, rather than taking what is most immediate. The third is similar, but different, and involves taking an idea or an ideal as the object – rather than something real. This last error can result in the individual becoming quite weird and ungrounded. Whenever I find someone displaying “odd” symptoms I tend to check the object they are using first.

It is generally best for people to put their attention on their most immediate sense of self, life or others. Sometimes I describe this as their best sense, sometimes as the one that is most obvious, other times just where their attention goes. Some people get really hung up on “is this the best sense, or is this better?” They basically waste time selecting an object instead of setting out to directly experience any of them. The point to emphasise to such people is that whilst it is important to have an object and to start by directing one’s attention to it – any object will do. There is not a “better” or “worse” object to use.

The error of hanging onto an object occurs either when people have had a “good run” using a particular object – or after a direct experience, when they have been using the real thing as their object of contemplation and being open to more (see section 5.3 for more on this). Hanging onto any object for long periods is an error because it is usually missing something more obvious, more immediate. There may also be an ulterior intention – like having juicy stuff to communicate or trying to hang onto a particular state. After a direct experience I instruct people to use what they have experienced as their object and be open to more – as a way of re-contacting the experience. However there comes a time when the experience has faded and trying to use that object no longer works – it is similar to putting one’s attention on an idea or a memory.

When working on another I have seen people make the ‘ideal’ error by trying to put their attention on the “real other” or the “divine other” when these are just ideas. I discourage this and tell them to take the actuality of the other right in front of them. Sometimes it is OK to work on another who is not present – someone like their mother or partner or son, someone they know really well. However they are then putting their attention on their idea or memory of the other, and this can go wrong – so I tell them to come back to a real live other in the room as soon as feasible.

The object is always a problem when working on life. The issue is that there is so much that can be used. The individual’s own life, the life in their body, the life in other people, the life in plants, the life in the room, the life in plants, the life in the carpet. Everything that is not self or other is part of life. So the choice is pretty well infinite. Here are the most common difficulties.

The most common problem is not being able to handle the large choice. Is this a better object than that? The key is to tell them that any object will do – there is not one that is better or closer to the Truth of life than any other – after all they are all part of ‘life’.
Sometimes people experience life disappearing from any object they direct their attention to. If this happens tell them to just set out to experience the life there anyway – whether they “sense” it or not.
Some people get hooked on life being the same as “alive”. This is an error and you should point out that dead things are also part of life. Restricting their choice to alive things is being closed to a part of life
People who use the life in themselves need to be careful to distinguish it from their ‘self’ – which is the object of a different question. This also applies, but less problematically, to people who use the life in another person as their object. The confusion seems more problematic with self and life.
People being unable to handle nothing arising in their contemplation and switching objects at every step in an attempt to ‘make something happen’.

4.4 Contemplation

As a long EI proceeds the likelihood of a direct experience is determined more and more by the participant’s willingness to be open. What is more their subjective sense of being open is likely to change – and participants need to be warned of this – otherwise they hang onto a sense of openness that was limited. The reason why their subjective sense changes is that as they become more open, as they drop levels of identification, their inner perspective on their inner world changes. Most people start by just noticing what is going on. If this runs out, or they run into a blank patch, then they are likely to start looking for material in their consciousness. A characteristic of this phase is noticing that in their inner space thoughts seem to emerge in one area, memories in another and images somewhere else. This is a deeper sense of personal awareness – but they have to be encouraged to cease “looking” for material and, as it were, sit back and notice at this deeper level. Later some people can experience entering or sinking into a void or blackness. Sometimes they experience reveries, like awake dreams, and they suddenly wake up and are unsure whether they were contemplating or goofing off. This is another indication of increased depth of openness, but like the other states will pass.

There are a number of standard errors that people make in this part of the technique. All the errors are ways in which the person’s mind seeks to retain a level of control over the process i.e. subvert it. Here are some of the more common ones;

hanging on to the object and intention. In order to be completely open the individual must let go of their initial focus, and of their intention. If they hang onto either of these in their “openness” then they will be closed. These people just need to be told to let it all go.
checking that they are doing it correctly. This is a very common problem for people who want to be perfect – or who are plagued by doubts about whether they are good enough. What happens is that at some stage in the process, and often in the openness phase, the individual will carry out a check that they are “doing the technique perfectly”. And of course that process of mental checking is not actually doing the technique. This person has their case excited every time I describe the technique in a lecture and every time I urge people to do it just as I say. In dealing with these people you must first check that they are doing the technique correctly – check very carefully so that they know you have really established the truth of it or not. If you are not thorough then the trip will return very quickly. Once you have checked it then establish what they are actually doing – are they breaking off the technique to carry out a check – or is doubt arising in their contemplation? If doubt is arising then that is what came up and they need to describe it -–and its effect on them – very fully. If they are breaking off and carrying out a check then instruct them to stop doing this and to trust that they will do the technique correctly until you check with them again.
trying to perceive the Truth. This is a very common trap, and is particularly prevalent when people are working on life or another – because the object is outside themselves. If you catch this in people’s description of their process then point out to them that Truth is not perceived but is experienced through no process. Focussing on their inner perception is as foolish as focussing on their hearing or sense of smell.
preconceived ideas. This is too big a topic to cover in a short paragraph here. I usually give a whole lecture on it –with examples from my own experience – to emphasise its importance. On 3-days I sometimes get people to imagine what their experience will be like and what they will experience – and then point out to them that these are preconceived ideas – and that in practice almost everyone is surprised by their experience of the Truth. I also make the point that you do not have to give up your beliefs – you just have to be prepared to be wrong. So it is not that a belief gets in the way because it is incorrect – it gets in the way because it is conditioning the individual’s openness.

Later in a long EI I give more and more talks about openness – and link it very strongly to acceptance and surrender. I have also found that emotionally moving stories help to increase the level of openness in the group.

I have run into an odd problem with a number of participants over the years. It manifests by the individual being plagued by a repetitive image or set of images every time they contemplate. I had one person who described one road after another. Another person described a succession of animals for days. What I have noticed is that this type of material arises quite quickly – and effectively prevents the individual from contemplating deeply. So I have devised a strategy that seems to work – but not always. There are four steps:

First I check the object that the person is using. Sometimes the repetition occurs because the individual is hanging onto a particular object and the object is throwing up the same association over and over again. Changing the object solves the problem.
Second I get the person to communicate absolutely everything about what it is that is repeatedly arising. What is its significance? How does it make them feel? What are the associations and memories? I tell them to really be behind their communication in case there is something about it that they are avoiding letting on.
If the above two steps have not resolved the problem then I tell the person to wait in their contemplation until something else has come up – in addition to the repetitive material. Just waiting will help deepen the individual’s contemplation – and sometimes a hidden association or feeling will emerge. A few times I have also noticed that something that they earlier tried to side step or overlook will come back. So often this will break the pattern – but not always
If none of the above resolve the problem I then instruct the person to simply ignore the repetitive material. I presume that it is being thrown up by the individual’s mind as a defensive screen aimed at stopping them contemplating – and it is best completely ignored.

I have noticed that individuals go through cycles on long Intensives. These cycles seem to be the result of identifications. The person will communicate material from a particular identification until it is run out. They will then run into a desert, a stage of emptiness. Then they will try to fabricate something, or get pissed off that nothing is happening – and at some point they may drop the identification. That point, when they drop it, may occur in a quiet moment or in the middle of an emotional outburst – but when it happens there is a significant increase in their openness. And direct experiences can occur at this point. One difficulty distinguishing this is that the dis-identification will shift the individual’s state energetically – so you cannot rely on that as an indicator of a direct experience. Once the person has dropped their previous identification they are then into a new realm of themselves and their experience – they have a whole new raft of material to work through and communicate. And their subjective sense of themselves and of the technique is quite likely to change.

The final issue worth highlighting under this discussion of contemplation and openness is that of criticalness. When describing the rules in the opening Lecture I always emphasise the rule about not passing any judgement, in any way whatsoever, positive or negative, on any other participant. Quite early on in the Intensive – and no later than day 4, I will give a talk on criticalness. I point out how it affects people in three profound ways.

If one person communicates criticalness to another participant on the Intensive, then it will cause all the participants to close down to a degree. It is the absence of judgements that makes the space safe for people to open up. If judgements are overheard, even if not directed at oneself, then there will be a distrust of the space and a closure. This will inhibit the group and the entire process. I encourage everyone to stick their hand up anytime they hear a judgement being made about anyone else in the room.
The person making the critical judgement or comment knows that they are intending to change the other person – and to some degree know that they are intending to cause injury. They may feel completely justified – but they do also know that what they are doing is wrong. And this will hold that individual up. This is why in the yogic system ‘ahimsa’ – non-injury – is the top priority. If you injure others you hold yourself back, you deny your power and ability. I do allow people to be critical of me, because they sometimes need to let off steam about authority figures. But I also warn them to not go so far that they hold themselves back in this way. (On the six week Intensive I told them to communicate their negativity about me in a way that I wouldn’t hear it. This was also a measure of self protection because I did not then know my capacity for tolerating negativity for that length of time. In the event I heard most of it and it was not a problem – at least not for me.)
Third the person stuck in criticalness is being unaware of something about themselves. The criticalness exercise is the fastest way to enhance ones personal awareness – and it is basically to find out what it is that you are not accepting about yourself in being critical of the other. I give personal examples of this to illustrate how it works, sometimes quite subtly.

4.5 Communication

There are two quite separate roles for communication on any Intensive. The first is to enable the individual to disidentify or let go of stuff that has arisen in their contemplation. On long EIs people will notice that if something comes up at the beginning of a walk or work period it tends to stick around for the whole period – whereas in the dyad it disappears once it is communicated. Provided, of course, that it is really communicated. By this I mean not reported but said in contact and owned in the communication. The more fully something is owned in contact with another the more fully can it be left behind.

The second role of communication is the opposite, it is in presenting an experience. I tell people that often an individual will not know that what occurred in their consciousness was a direct experience – until they communicate it fully. And now what I mean by communicate fully is being seen in the experience by another person. I used to think it was a question of getting the words right and being behind them – but now Ii am sure that the real issue is being seen in the experience by another person. This is a profound acknowledgement of the experience and is what makes it available to the individual later. I have quite a lot more to say about this – in section 5.3.

It is clear from this description of the purposes of communication that they are both served by the person being fully present and in contact when communicating. The most common errors that are made are:

reporting what has come up as if it happened to someone else
not making a clear break between contemplation and communication. This means that at least part of the communication is made with the person focussing on their internal experience, often with their eyes closed, rather than attending to the contact with their partner.
being shy or embarrassed. This can occur for either very positive or very negative material. If I notice this I recommend the person choose one of their favourite partners to communicate this to. (see also next section on ten conditions)
embellishing or editing material that arises. At some point I include this in a lecture and emphasise the importance of communicating exactly what came up and nothing more. When I did this I discovered the degree to which I failed to tell the truth in order to try to look good, to preserve my image and to impress people. It was a real discipline to communicate only exactly what comes up in my contemplation.
presenting difficult material in a joking fashion. I warn participants about this and emphasise the service they do if they can resist smiling and laughing when someone does this. By laughing they reinforce the defence the person is using to not own their material.

There are usually a few people in the group who are addicted to talking. This arises for people who are used to “thinking out loud” – or who just revel in having a captive audience. The people involved will not do themselves any favours because they will be continually losing energy. Sometimes I joke with them about it; “You know if people could get enlightened by talking a lot there would be a lot more enlightened people in the world!” I find it is usually a continual struggle to help compulsive talkers to contemplate enough – but when they do they often do very well.

4.6 The Ten Conditions

I find it helpful to tell people about the following conditions that Charles Berner said were required for people to have deep direct experiences. Here is the list; I will then elucidate what I say about each separately.

1. Accept guidance from someone who has had deep experiences

2. Use a focusing tool

3. Communicate completely with NO vagueness

4. Contemplate steadily

5. Be willing to give up beliefs and pre-conceived ideas

6. Be willing to express anti-social behaviour, thoughts and phenomena

7. Be willing for your life to change

8. Treat people well, by your own true inner standard

9. Want the Truth for the Truth’s sake (not just for egotistical reasons)

10. Be willing for it to come out however it comes out.

The above ten points were specified by Charles Berner. In addition there are two other requirements

(11) Intend to have a deep direct experience

(12) Be willing and able to handle sexual energy without either suppressing it or acting out on it.

1. Accept guidance from someone who has had deep experiences

When I started running Long Intensives I found this very hard to declare and own. I am now quite confident that I can lead people to deep experiences – but inevitably when you start out you will not have that confidence. It is critical that people trust you and your guidance. There are usually people on every Intensive who fail to trust me – and they never get very far. So you have to be confident and behave at all times with complete integrity. One of my strengths as a long EI master is that I have complete confidence in myself, the process and in everyone’s ability to have a direct experience.

2. Use a focusing tool

This is the core insight that Rinzai made and which lead to the use of a koan in that Zen tradition. I find it helps some people to make it clear to them that the question and the focus of their attention is simply a tool. But an essential one.

3. Communicate completely with NO vagueness

I have covered this to some degree in the section on communication. The no vagueness statement is helpful because that is one way in which people avoid presenting really difficult or embarrassing material. I usually emphasise with this one the need to express the level of emotional content accurately. Some people tend to understate their emotions, others like drama and overstate them. The key is to communicate exactly what occurs without either emphasis or editing.

4. Contemplate steadily

Steadily means that the individual is contemplating all the time, that they are not taking long breaks. In order to go deep it is essential to maintain a steady persistence. If a person contemplates very intensely for a period and then ceases (by thinking about something else or going for a nature ramble) they will fail to ever go deep enough to have a deep experience.

5. Be willing to give up beliefs and pre-conceived ideas

I have mentioned this in the section on contemplation and openness. Stress the “be willing” part. It is not necessary to dismiss ones beliefs or ideas, they may well be correct. But it is essential that one is willing to be wrong. I often use a political figure who has widespread unpopularity to make this point. “What if Margaret Thatcher were right? What if George Bush was right?” As mentioned earlier this is a big topic and needs to be dealt with at length sometime later in the Intensive – say around days 8 to 10.

6. Be willing to express anti-social behaviour, thoughts and phenomena

Now the willingness includes actually doing it. And the anti-social material might be really embarrassing. Stuff in this category includes deep prejudice, sexual preferences and habits, phobias and things that the person has done that they have always regretted. I point out that in spiritual books I have only once found anyone willing to publicly own this sort of material (Wilber, in Grace and Grit owned up to hitting his wife when she was dying of cancer). I always give examples of my own to make the point – and I do not hold back from owning the examples in the lecture. This always gets to people and takes the group to a deeper level of reality.

7. Be willing for your life to change

This is similar to condition 5. It is not that how the person is living their life is wrong, nor does it mean that having a deep experience will force them to change how they live. But they need to be open to that possibility – otherwise there are whole realms that are excluded from their openness. Common areas include material associated with God or religion and denial of significant family relationships.

8. Treat people well, by your own true inner standard

This is a reference to the issue of not harming other people – otherwise it will hold you back. I sometimes give a talk about final barriers in which I discuss ways in which people can overcome a sense of not deserving the Truth that can result from injuring others. There are basically three strategies. One is too know that injuring others was due to ignorance, so knowing the Truth will, to the degree that it dispels ignorance, help avoid future injury to others. The second is to make a deal with yourself, some way in which you can improve how you behave in the world sop that you feel you deserve the Truth. The deal is not conditional on you having an experience – you just make the deal to feel more deserving. And the third way out is to start right no treating other people better. This means not voicing your criticalness, volunteering to change or sit out, not trying to be first to the meal table to get the largest dinner and so on.

9. Want the Truth for the Truth’s sake (not just for egotistical reasons)

Everyone starts wanting the Truth for egotistical reasons. We don’t even know what the Truth is when we start out – so its inevitable that we will embark with egoic motives that will, at some point, be inappropriate. A lot of people, myself included, are driven to seek Truth, out of desperation. But the desperation is a desire to change, to have things better, more the way I want them – and this is, in the end, inappropriate. I get people to look at their motives for being on the Intensive and to accept the egoic reasons (they are necessary for householders) but to also reinforce their pure desire for Truth.

10. Be willing for it to come out however it comes out.

This is similar to condition 9. What distinguishes it is that even though there are egoic and pure reasons for wanting to experience Truth, these are not going to condition how you are during the Intensive. You are not going to fall for trying to force the issue, nor for giving up when things get hard. You are going to go ahead and give yourself the very best opportunity you can – and accept whatever you get. I usually make the point that this strategy is also the one that gives the most “side benefits” i.e. insights and self understanding

11 Intend to have a deep direct experience

This was a trick I learned from Skanda (Lawrence Noyes). You really do get what you intend – and if you are only intending for a small experience then that is what you are likely to get. He used a fishing metaphor to make the point. If you want to catch a small fish you choose a light rod, a line with a low breaking strength and you use small bait. To catch a big fish you need a heavy rod, a line with a high breaking strength and bait that will attract a big fish.

12 Be willing and able to handle sexual energy without either suppressing it or acting out on it.

With this condition I explain that if sexual material arises, or if what comes up is that you are feeling really horny, then you need to communicate it fully. Allow that energy to be there – but don’t act on it and don’t blow it. I usually explain that this energy is the energy that is built up and that facilitates the breakthroughs that occur. (see also my extended discussion of kundalini in section 7.)